I Will Laugh Every Time I Sit On the Couch

I'm quickly learning that NYC furnishings and decor are not a reflection of one's taste, necessarily. But rather, a reflection of one's resourcefulness.

I think I'm pretty decent at the game (90% of our Utah home furnishings were Deseret Industries, black paint and sandpaper, after all), but New York - you sly devil with your public transportation, narrow hallways and sixth-floor walkups - you are a trickier opponent.

Perhaps we hit a new low, but I'm not ashamed to admit it as we're now the proud owners of two free couches, a great unit of shelves and another evening of hilarity to add to our arsenal.

I noticed a few free couches on Craiglist that were actually in pretty decent condition and -remarkable! - the owner lived just 1.5 blocks away. We went by after work, affirmed that they were in relatively good condition and did not reek of an identifiable (or worse, unidentifiable) odor and hauled them - in a comical blend of total white trash and Banana Republic business casual - down 10th Avenue to their temporary crash pad (we're moving to our real place on Saturday).

The loveseat made the trip without a hitch. But the larger couch proved to be a little much for my quivering forearms so there were a lot of pauses and readjustments between my bursts of laughter at the situation in general.

The whole ordeal hit a real high when a group of guys walked by and one said to the others, "pivot... pivot..." Hands-down my favorite Friends quote of all time. I was ready to throw the quote out at the opportune time, but thank you, random stranger, for beating me to the punch.

My forearms held in there until we got to the front door of our apartment and our uber-narrow hallway which posed a new threat - nowhere to tilt. Noah maneuvered and tilted with the best of them, the opposite end of the couch thudding against our across-the-hall neighbor's door while I tried my best to stifle my laughter. I could hear our neighbor shuffling around his kitchen (entryway, dining room, it's all one room, really) and I desperately fought off the ensuing church-giggle, knowing our paper-thin walls would have made it sound like I was standing right beside him. I didn't want him getting curious about the commotion and flinging open the door just in time to see my head literally pressed against his door trying to shift the couch just one... more... inch.

Finally, I decided it wisest to let the heretofore stranger neighbor in on our couch conquest and ask him if we could swing the couch into his doorway to allow for that extra inch of tilt. To which he kindly obliged.

And now we have two couches standing upright in what used to be the only walking room in the apartment (for, where else would you have me put them?) and we also know our neighbor. So, win-win.